Chapter six: Transformation & apprenticeship

When a Being Entrepreneur gets stuck, which inevitably will happen, it may seem like there are only two options: push harder or let go of the dream. In these moments of frustration, we are being invited to step into the "third way". However, accessing this new realm of possibility, first requires a change in our BEING.

In my case this meant letting go of the belief that 1) I knew what my prospective clients needed and 2) I was already prepared to serve them in this way. By surrendering into "not knowing" I gave myself permission to become an explorer again. I could now engage people in meaningful dialogue about their aspirations and pain points (rather than feel the pressure to persuade them about my proposition).

Off-loading the burden, I was carrying until then helped me see beyond the self-imposed constraints I had put on myself and the business. The short term results I had been expecting were simply unrealistic given the magnitude of the vision I was holding. From this new place I could sense another way forward. I was being invited to let go of outcomes, time constraints and, most importantly perhaps, the belief that I was READY to fully embrace and deliver transformational coaching in organizations.

This was the moment to fundamentally re-define success from something that is outside of my control (projects, sales, clients, profit…) to something I can fully embrace irrespective of the circumstances. This simple shift in perspective was incredibly liberating. I was starting to surrender into a more trusting partnership with the “universal forces”. As long as I continue to focus on projects that are a pure expression of my authentic self AND within my control, then the universe will do its part to open doors and show me the next steps on the path.

The first idea that came to me as a result of stepping into this alternate paradigm of entrepreneurship was very simple, but also very profound. What if I didn’t know what organizations needed? What if, instead of closing the previous market researcher chapter, I would reclaim it and build on it in this new chapter?

Sure enough, one day, shortly after opening myself up to these new possibilities, I knew in every cell of my body what I needed to do next. It was so obvious now yet only a few weeks ago it would have been impossible to imagine.

During the next 6 - 12 months I would put on hold everything I thought I knew about organizational transformation and re-immerse into this field as a researcher to genuinely explore what it takes to bring a new level of consciousness into organizations. I imagined creating a short documentary film in which I interview a wide range of thought leaders and weave together a compelling story that would give more context and inspiration for the deep transformational work I aspire to do with leaders and their organizations. It would be a rite of passage of sorts, one that would not only be a rich source of insights, but also serve to build my credibility as a thought leader & storyteller of the new paradigm.

It was hugely ambitious, especially because I had very limited filmmaking experience, but it was one that was within my control. So, I started putting together a plan. At least 5 or 6 visionary leaders came to mind that I had worked with and would be open to such an interview. I could also think of a couple of spiritual mentors who could beautifully speak about the awakening that is happening in society and the evolutionary impact this is having on all our systems and structures. The plan also consisted of a budget, timeline and overall theme that would tie everything together. Specifically, I wanted to know what it meant to bring HEART into business.

I was curious why highly respected business leaders like Steve Jobs or hard core physicists like Albert Einstein, who had come to the conclusion that Heart or the Inner Voice were key to their success, were not having more impact on the way we run our organizations.

“Don't let the noise of other's opinions drown out your own inner voice. And most important, have the courage to follow your heart and intuition. They somehow already know what you truly want to become. Everything else is secondary." Steve Jobs

“Everyone who is seriously involved in the pursuit of science becomes convinced that a spirit is manifest in the laws of the universe, a spirit vastly superior to man."

Albert Einstein

On the one hand we recognize these deep universal truths and on the other hand we discard them as impractical when it comes to day-to-day management. This was a fascinating paradox that I was determined to shine light on in my research project.

So, I went ahead and bought myself a small handheld camera and reached out with my idea to the people I wanted to interview. It was beautiful how quickly and positively people got back to me. Such a contrast to the painful experience of “selling” my services until then. I was finding it so much easier to engage people from this open place of discovery and genuine curiosity. There was energy in the idea and before long a plan had come together that would take me to Vancouver, Seattle, San Francisco, Boston and then back to Europe. It was exhilarating to be moving forward on my entrepreneurial journey with such purpose, freedom and commitment. I guess the Universe also liked what was unfolding because one day, out of the blue, I received an email from Lia Jaspers.

Lia is somebody I met a couple of years earlier while doing market research on laundry detergents in Munich. It was one of the most magical days of my market research career. I was scheduled to spend a full day with Lia to understand how doing the laundry, and her choice of products, fit into the broader context of her life. This ethnographic research was the most powerful way to extract mind and heart opening insights. Not only because it was easier to connect the dots between who somebody is as a person and their laundry habits and practices, but also because spending a whole day with someone made it possible to establish a deeper, trusting connection. They would share more freely and, as a result, deeper insights got revealed.

In my case, I got a little distracted from the laundry detergent learning objectives when Lia started talking about her life as a documentary filmmaker. She was an adventurous spirit who fearlessly travelled around the world to capture the important, but often under-reported, human stories. There was purpose and passion in everything she did. She inspired me to also open up and share my emerging ideas about the evolving paradigm in organizations and how I was starting to see a role for me to play in facilitating this transition. Together we imagined the possibility of a documentary film that would reveal the need for profound organizational transformation through the lens of the more conscious, younger generation entering the workforce. It was exciting to dream about these possibilities but at the end of the day I was still a market researcher for laundry detergents so the prospects of making it happen was unrealistic at the time.

Upon my return home, I wrote Lia a postcard thanking her for the inspiring day and left my email address, hoping we could stay in touch. Apart from the postcard she wrote back to me, we didn’t hear from each other until 2 or 3 years later - when all the stars were aligned.

In her email Lia spoke about finding the postcard I had sent after our day together in Munich, remembering our talk about the evolving business world and googling to see what I was up to. She found Inner Voice Calling website and was so pleased to see the changes I had made that she felt compelled to reach out and playfully ask what had become of my documentary idea. Of course, she didn’t know that I was planning the heart in business film adventure so receiving her message in that moment was even more mind blowing to me. It was from this point on that my trust in universal forces really started to become a way of life.

A couple of skype calls later, I had not one, but two professional documentary filmmakers join me on my adventures. Normally this would of course never have been possible with the small budget I had put aside but the project, and the North America road trip that came with it, was so inspiring to them that they agreed to join me. I simply needed to cover their travel and accommodation costs.

Here’s a note from my journal that I wrote just before boarding the plane and starting this journey.

As I board the plane, kicking off a two-week road trip to the US, I feel the same as I did many years ago when I went to visit an old girlfriend in Arizona. At the time I remember being on a mission. I talked about it as something I needed to do but didn’t yet know what it was. Deep inside I was being called to reconnect with this person who taught me how to love, but I had no expectations of re-discovering the magic we once had.

Many people supported my quest in beautiful ways, as if they could relate, or wished they had done something similar. And somehow, I was totally OK with those who thought I was crazy or just needed to move on. The trip was filled with precious moments – happy ones, painful ones and sad ones. I experienced them all as fully as I could and on the last day, late at night, everything became clear.

There was something important I needed to say, something that was hiding deep inside my heart and finally at that moment I was able to access and express the feeling that was holding me back. I discovered a deep inner peace, said goodbye and opened up the space to love once again.

As I board the plane, kicking off a two week road trip to the US, I can’t help but wonder if my quest to uncover the Heart in Business will also come with many deep personal gifts like the ones I experienced when I followed my heart to Arizona.

There are certainly many questions whirling around inside of me: is the business world ready for more heart, is it possible to make the heart more tangible and relevant to business, will I be able to create shifts in perspective, is there room for the deep transformational work I want to do in organizations, can I be successful in my new career path? Wow, despite my bright hopes and dreams of a more heart-centered business world, there are many doubts and fears lurking around the corner.

When I committed to my calling one and a half years ago, I knew it would be challenging but I felt well equipped and trusted that the right opportunities would present themselves. Looking back now I am definitely grateful for the very interesting projects that have come my way but somehow I have not yet attracted the deeper transformational work that I believe can have such a powerful impact in the business context.

Have I not positioned myself in the right way? Am I not connecting with the needs? Do I need to build more credibility and trust, or is the timing just not right? Can I trust my own heart which is clearly telling me to continue down this road or do I give into the fear and settle back into a more secure life? I am clearly at a crossroads…

As I board the plane, kicking off a two-week road trip to the US, I know some powerful discoveries are about to happen. I will walk away wiser and have an incredible story to tell. Some of the questions will be answered, others will fade away, and I suspect new ones will arise. Perhaps this is what it’s all about: staying open, discovering the gifts and trusting that in this flow I will get in touch with the greatest potential that wants to emerge.

Upon our return, I was handed a hard drive with 100+ hours of footage to sort through and create an overall storyline no longer than 10 - 12 minutes long. At first it was a daunting task. I didn’t know where to start and had no prior experience. It took me a couple of months of dedicated work to bring this wealth of wisdom down to its essence. In doing so, not only did I discover the art of editing, but I also processed and integrated the insights from the various interviews at a deeper level within my being. This felt like the rite of passage I needed to go through before I could engage business leaders in a credible way.

At the end of these months an overall narrative emerged that would naturally tie the essential content pieces together. I reached out to Lia, flew to Munich, and within a couple of days, the film I had dreamt up 12 months ago, had become a reality.

Heart in Business video

I now had an inspiring story to tell. In the process of collecting insights from experts about the value of more heart in business, I had become a credible expert myself. This was not just a theoretical piece of work. It became the foundation of how I show up in my own business. Fully embodying the heart in business principles would become the most compelling way to engage others and eventually earn the trust of clients.

At the core of this approach was a radical redefinition of success. Until then, I had thought about it as a function of the output I achieved. This traditional approach made me focus on things mostly out of my control (for example, signing up clients, yearly revenue targets…). As a result of the heart in business project I altered my relationship with success. Instead of defining it as the quantity of business generated, it was now all about the quality of conversations I would have with anyone who came on my path. The beauty of defining success in this way is that it was now fully in my control. I could simply choose to tell my story and share my heart in business research findings with all the passion and excitement that I was feeling.

In doing so, some amazing things happened. Shifting the focus from selling to storytelling and authentically living my vision for a more heart centered business sparked the curiosity, intrigue and eventually trust of the people I wanted to serve. Ironically, by letting go of outcomes, the outcomes I had been attached to previously, started to come. I was now attracting clients rather than selling to clients. This radically new way of doing business was not only more effective but also more fun and fulfilling. It also unleashed many more creative projects aimed at bridging the divide between where the business world is today and where it could be in the future.

The first one was a short story that unfolds as a dialogue between the voice of Business (representing the mainstream ideas about what business is or should be), the voice of what it could be (represented by Spirit or Potential), and my own voice as coach at the time. I started writing it as an experiment, curious what would happen when I authentically embodied both of these perspectives without judgment or bias.

The following interaction between myself and Spirit gives a sense of what I, and many other Being Entrepreneurs, will experience along the way.

Mark:

I am having one of those days when I am finding it difficult to see the bigger picture. It’s as if I’ve fallen from the sky and landed back in a place of survival and fear. I can only see a few meters ahead of me. My dreams appear out of touch and impractical. I wonder if it is time to let go and move back into a more secure and predictable place. I am stuck in no man’s land with one foot in a life full of hope, and another wanting to step back into a more conventional life. Has my time run out? Have I failed to demonstrate success in my new career path? Do I need to make a choice or can I live happily somewhere in between? I have given the best of myself and am very proud of the effort I have put in. I will not look back on these years with regret, wishing I had done something different. I am wondering about the partnership with Spirit though. Although I have lots of evidence that this partnership can work, right now I feel alone and abandoned. I am doubting my ability to hold on to the dream, to keep taking steps in the right direction. I know the feeling is temporary and that breakthrough might be just around the corner but what I am experiencing is real and I want to live it as fully as possible. Right now that means being vulnerable, experiencing the pain and facing the fear. It’s only in this openness that I can receive the gift. I wonder what it is…

Spirit:

I’ve been knocking on many doors these days, whispering words of encouragement and hope as more and more people are feeling the urgency to change. I am so excited about the shift that is taking place and the amount of people stepping into their true power. Every day I am getting more requests to serve and contribute in a more meaningful way. Each time somebody steps up to the challenge and into the unknown they empower me to guide them along the way. It becomes so much easier for me to open doors, facilitate “chance” meeting and inspire new ideas. My wish is that our journeys into the unknown are as smooth and graceful as possible but I realize it is not always easy to experience them as such. To welcome new ideas we must first let go of the old ones. Just as some doors need to close before new ones can open. I am aware this process is painful and can take time. It requires inner work, openness, trust and patience. We can often feel alone and be tempted to turn around. I hear Mark’s cry for help. I wish I could make it easier for him at the moment but there is only so much I can do. He needs time to process and extract the gifts from this experience. All I can say is doors are waiting to be opened.

You can read the rest of the dialogue here.

Building on this approach of embodying the thoughts, feelings and fears of business leaders I aspired to serve, a next film project was born. I wanted to tell the story of a CEO the night before having to give an important speech to his organization. He is struggling to find a way in which he can share the disappointing business results while inspiring and motivating his people to move forward with nex hope for the future. Rather than figuring out his speech in the office, he steps out into the night and has a series of “chance” encounters that significantly impact the way he perceives the challenges and decides to address the organization the next morning. When my film making friends came back on board for this project, they encouraged me to take the embodiment experiment to a new level. I was not only the author of the story, I had also become the main actor, playing the role of the CEO.

CEO talking to himself the night before an important speech to his organization:

It’s late & I just got the final numbers in for the quarter. Once again we have under performed. It’s now the 4th quarter in a row of declining sales. None of the strategic changes we have made over the last year seem to be working. Tomorrow morning I need to announce the results to my organization, and then afterwards to the analysts on Wall Street. I have no idea what I am going to say. I’ve been telling them that conditions are improving and that our recent product upgrades and pricing interventions will put us back on track. We have even implemented a number of internal processes to boost productivity. I no longer believe this is working and I suspect the rest of the organization feels the same. This story is not working anymore but I have no idea where to go from here.

It’s already 9pm, I’m starving. This will definitely be a long night so I better get a quick bite to eat at the Chinese around the corner. Hopefully some inspiration will come.

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Three hours later, I just got back into the office. What was supposed to be a quick bite turned into an incredible experience. It started with the fortune cookie I got at the end of my meal, which said: “The answers to your questions will be found in unexpected places”. I wasn’t sure what to make of this but somehow it resonated with me. So rather than going straight back to the office, which I normally would do, I wandered down the empty street. It was an unusually quiet night. All I could hear was a street performer playing his guitar in the background. It sounded nice so I walked over to listen in more carefully. He greeted me with a warm smile. His music was soothing and during those few moments all my worries about my speech disappeared. I thanked him and as I went to put some money in his case, I noticed a small sign lying beside it saying: “I warm Hearts. Who do you choose to be”? At this point the office was the last thing on my mind. Something was happening and I was curious what was in store for me next. It was time for a drink.

So I ventured into the little café that I must have walked by many times before but never really noticed until now. I took a seat at the bar and ordered a pint of Sam Adams. I took out my fortune cookie message and laid it down beside my glass. There I was, a few hours before addressing my organization. I still had no idea what I was going to say but at this point I knew the answers would not be found in the office. I also knew I would have to look deep inside and question the kind of leader I had been and who I would choose to be in the future.

“Who do I choose to be”? That is a question I hadn’t asked myself for a long while! As I took my first sip of Sam Adams I was instantly transported back to my university years when I had spent some time in Boston. It reminded me of the energy and passion I once felt about making a difference in the world. Everything seemed possible. What has happened since then? I somehow forgot why I got into business in the first place. Had I slowly drifted away from who I was back then? Was now the time to re-connect?

At that moment one of our recent hires in the accounting department walked in and took a seat beside me. I had seen him before in the office but we hadn’t met officially yet. I was a bit embarrassed when he came to sit beside me because I didn’t know his name. Luckily he introduced himself and we got on talking. I asked him about the job and his first impressions of the company. It was so interesting to get a fresh perspective. His understanding of the business was impressive and to my surprise the story he saw in the numbers was very different from mine. I had been looking at the aggregated numbers and from this viewpoint things were obviously very bleak. But at a micro level he was seeing pockets of opportunity. Some of our efforts were actually working very well but they were small and got lost in the busyness of trying to fix the big problems. We’ve stopped seeing the parts of our business that are working!!

Of course I wanted to know more. So he went on to explain that the pockets of opportunity were coming from some of the “side projects” that were low on the strategic priority list but high on some people’s passion list. In fact one of the projects he mentioned I remember specifically asking the person to STOP working on it. I wonder how much bigger it could have been had I given him the green light and wholeheartedly supported the effort. I knew from now on I would have to start finding out.

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My night back in the office turned out to be a very inspiring one. I even managed to get a few hours of sleep. A couple of minutes from now I will be giving my speech. It’s going to be very different from the usual ones but for the first time in a long time I feel we are about to embark on an exciting new path, one that will truly re-energize our people and the business.

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Good morning everyone, it’s nice to see you all. Until a few hours ago I was dreading this talk because once again the overall numbers have not come in as expected. But some amazing things happened last night that have profoundly changed the way I look at the business and what I think we need to do to move forward. So rather than focus on our current results, I would like to take this time to share with you how my perspective has changed and the impact this will have on our organization.

My preparation for today’s speech was very unusual. It was inspired by a fortune cookie, a street performer and finally a conversation with one of our colleagues, whom I bumped into while having a drink. It was this last conversation that helped me understand the biggest issue we are facing. I realized that our business is evolving and that my focus has been in the wrong place. In prioritizing the strategies that have worked for us in the past, I have not been able to see the new opportunities emerging in the marketplace. But many of you have and the initiative you took to develop these new ideas anyway seems to be paying out. A closer look at the data actually shows that, despite the overall decline in the numbers, there are some very promising pockets of opportunity. When I found out about this I was so moved by the passion and determination that so many of you bring to the job. I was also embarrassed that I hadn’t been paying more attention to these efforts and supporting them in the right way.

Going forward this is going to change. I want to know about all the ideas bubbling up within the organization. I want us to harness the energy and passion in each one of you and use this to create projects that will once again put us at the leading edge of the industry. We will be replacing the tight controls we put in place to squeeze out more productivity with a more open & trusting culture to promote more creativity and responsibility. These changes are effective immediately!

The second insight I got from last night will be key in making these changes a reality. While watching the street performer I was prompted to think about a question that I hadn’t considered for a long time. “Who do I choose to be”? Such a simple and powerful question but unfortunately it is one that I have ignored (perhaps because I have been too focused on the question: what do we choose to do?). It reminded me of the aspirations I had as a young business student. I was full of hope about the future and committed to making a meaningful difference in the world. Personally I will be reflecting on this question but I would also like to encourage us to take some time and think about who we want to be as an organization? For example, what would our work be like if we chose to listen more deeply to each other, to ask the difficult questions and meet challenges with an open mind, to challenge the status quo, to encourage new ideas, to be passionate & creative…What would it take to commit to this new way of being?

Finally, we need to get out of the office more often. After my experience last night I am convinced that there is so much valuable knowledge out there that is simply not available to us when we spend most of our time in the office. It’s not just about spending more time with our customers and suppliers. We also need to think about how we interact with them and who we interact with (are we asking the right questions & listening deeply enough?). We need to pay more attention to our other stakeholders and understand how these relationships can be nurtured. We can look even beyond our stakeholders for inspiration. For example, in my case last night following the advice of a fortune cookie opened up a whole new set of experiences that ultimately led to the creation of this speech.

I sincerely believe that these changes are going to set us up for success in the long run. But it won’t be easy nor will it come overnight. The pressure to continue delivering short term results will not go away and we will need to do a better job of managing the expectations of Wall Street. Again, it is about how we choose to respond to these pressures and the story we decide to tell that will make the difference. I am convinced there are some big ideas coming to life in our organization and that we have incredibly talented and passionate people to make them happen. As long as we keep highlighting and drawing attention to this I am sure our stakeholders will eventually come back on board too.

To conclude this chapter I leave you with a poem that perfectly expresses the depth of personal transformation I was going through as part of my apprenticeship of becoming an important voice for the future of business.

The great divide:

On the left there is business

It loves to think and problem solve

Move fast and talk with resolve

Perform so hard it wears you down

If only it would stop to breathe and look around

On the right there is Heart

Gently offering to play its part

It looks around from 10ft above

And knows deep inside

The time has come to think out wide

But this seed of possibility

Dream of a new reality

Will wither away on its own

If it sits there all alone

These worlds seem so far away

Many think they don’t belong

But like a lover gone astray

Who says that with the right song

They won’t come out to play?

More than ever they need each other

One to listen and one to talk

One to pause and one to walk

One to dream and one to act

One to trust and one with facts

One to flow and one to plan

One to focus and one to expand

One to think and one to feel

One to stretch and one to heal

One to sense and one to see

One to Do and one to Be

Together they are whole

Like partnering the Ego and the Soul

Deep inside my Heart

I feel I have a role to play

In uniting these worlds so apart

Help them see a way

But where do I start?

I’m tired going it alone

Do you feel the same

Out there on your own?

Together we can heal, make it real

We can hold hands, reach out, build bridges

And when new perspectives are revealed

Like with a masterpiece of art

Our minds will open

To business with a Heart